The ray of light shines across the floor,
I take your soft hand in mine,
One hand in yours,
Another on your waist,
The music starts,
We march to the sway of the beat.
I pull you closer to me, face to face eyes locked.
Dancing across this ocean floor,
Stepping right up to the groove,
Losing ourselves in our stare,
Walking around each other,
Like birds in a mating game,
Step right up to this sweet charade.
Inching closer within breathing distance, so close yet so far.
Turning slowly together on smoothed surface,
Your leg entwines around mine,
You place your hand around my neck,
Leaning so strongly against me with your delicate back,
I tighten my grip and bring you slowly down and back up again,
Lost in the symphony of song and lights.
To end this would almost be a shame, to end this sweet embrace.
-Mating game
Sometimes we feel more emotional than other days, the same show that you’ve seen before may not make you cry the first time round, but when you watch it again, it can sometimes make you tear. One particular episode of smallville can do just that, its season 5’s episode 12, entitled reckoning.
This is my summary of the episode and the parts where I cried: “Clark decides to tell Lana the truth and reveals his true identity and also proposes to her, fast forward into the middle of the episode, Lana gets involved in a car accident and dies, While on the phone with Clark, she tells him Lex is chasing her and she doesn’t see an oncoming bus which ends up hitting her. The whole scene comes to a slow down, where Lex gets out in tears seeing what has happened, and then Clark appears out of super speed, he rushes to the accident and rips the door off the overturned car and touches Lana to find her dead and begins to cry, its at this moment where the scene and music makes me tear, and then the father happens to stop by and rush over to pull Clark away.
Clark chooses to return to the past with the power of his fortress and relives the same day, where he is about to tell Lana the truth, which he decides not to. However, the events of the same day play out in a similar way, where Lana is about to involved in accident again, with Lex chasing her, in both cases Lex kissed her because he was drunk and upset, so it starts the chase, this time Clark prevents the accident, and his father drives by the scene without stopping and sees Lex apologizing to Lana.
The father was on his way to meet Lionel Luthor at their barn, in the previous events, the father would have stopped to go to Clark. This time, instead of Lana dying, the father gets in a fight with Lionel in the barn and this causes him to have a heart attack, and then he proceeds to walk out of the barn, where Clark and his mother were just driving home and they spot him, the last few moments of the father’s life, Lana’s life traded for the father’s, the very same music plays once more where Lana died, and here is where I tear one more time.”
Since I last wrote, the computer has been moved into my room, and the shift makes everything feel so different, it is a lot warmer in my room since the fan is above my bed and not my computer, so I often turn on the air con to cool the room for awhile. Although when I go to sleep, I switch off the air con. I now have two desks to work from, one for my pc and one for my laptop, both use wireless so there is no need for wires, and the best part is there is plenty of space to dine in my own room! Nothing like a nice glass of merlot with a warm meal with the accompaniment of music to chill by.
Right now, it’s a little warm in the afternoon, and the cat is sleeping in the chair behind me. I’ve been busy contemplating on whether to start adding photos to my blog, I’ve never done if before, so I guess I’d give it a try, though I feel it might affect my style a little. To me, I rather not compromise on the writing because of pictures, but I figured I should start taking a lot more pictures.
The main concern is perhaps not writing people’s names in my blog, which has been something I’ve been doing for quite some time. For the mean time, I guess I’ll stick to pictures of objects and places, and not people. For my cat, I guess it will be fine.
So here is a picture of my cat sleeping behind me, for him, I guess I can make an acception for his name, which is Indie which is inspired by Indiana Jones. It’s a long story, best left to my sister to tell, for me in person.
School has been good, I had canoe land training last week, which I must say, was something I had been hoping for a long time. A breakdown of what we did, 400+ pushups (I did 380 Standard proper pushups, there was one set where I had not recovered where I needed to cheat a little.) 100+ crunches, leg lifts and body builders( body builders are a combination of burpies and pushups combined, not that hard) 100 or so jumping jacks( I don’t really consider this at all, its probably just for show…) 35 pull-ups and I assisted a total of 60 reps for other people, half of which were those who were terribly heavy(think obese and they couldn’t even lift less than half their weight) The assisting was harder than doing pull-ups with weights attached! In all, out of forty or so guys who turned up, only seven were still doing the pushups, and half of those still doing were not doing it properly any more.
It felt good to be among the remaining seven, and still going strong, but Its not a fair comparison because I am older, I’ve trained a lot more, and when I mean a lot, I mean extra years of advantage which make a huge difference, even though the day before, I had trained my chest and abs in the gym. When you’ve got an entire group doing the training with you, you feel like you can do more, because you want to do it with them.
I’ve almost forgotten what its like to train with people, I’ve had so much time to train solo, and I would never do that many pushups on my own. I hope to see even tougher training the following week. After the training, I had dinner with the seniors, their quite a fun bunch, and it was easy to relate with them. I look forward to the next training, perhaps at least an additional 100 to which ever amount for each exercise we’re doing? I dream of a 1000 pushups in one session… (That is still a dream, I’ve never done that many before, but to test my endurance to that level would be truly interesting, though muscle sacrificing)
Went to an outside gym with two classmates yesterday to teach them how to train, their quite fun just that one laughs like a crazy woman non-stop, which kind of makes it embarrassing. I find it great that I can still relate to those younger than me and of course enjoy their company. Ah oh yes, the cats awoke and changed his place of rest. The only camera I use now is my current handphone’s camera… too lazy to use any other or charge my old one.
Next week’s another week, and I’ve got a day and a half to focus myself again to be at my peak and accomplish the goals I’ve set out for myself. And of course, some time to continue my reading of the monk who sold his Ferrari. The week before last, I gave away that book to someone I met in the botanic gardens where I was reading, she had lost her handphone, and was distressed, so I spoke to her for awhile, before we knew it, I gave her my book cause I felt she needed it more than me, then we became friends and exchanged contacts. Last weekend I got a new one at times at Jelita, in each of these instances, I walked to the locations and back, I find it rather nice to walk instead of taking a bus, its not to save money or anything, but you get to see a lot of things you may not have seen if you took a bus.
This finally brings me to the reason why I titled this blog post crimson autumn. There was a moment last weekend when I was walking to the Jelita along sixth avenue where I saw a tree that was quite bare, save for sparse red leaves, next to it was the same type of tree but it was all green and full of life, it was in that moment where that image was forever burnt into mine, and I felt full of emotion and nearly teared right there and then.
In all, I realize that I have been more in touch with my emotions as of late, where I can feel an emotion more deeply or stronger than before, and this can overwhelm me and cause me to cry. I guess I have been able to appreciate things more and feel more emotion than I normally allow myself too.
The tree was bare and it looked so sad, with the red leaves clinging on for dear life, and then at that moment, when the wind blew, the leaves began to fall, and it was like an autumn fall where it began to rain red leaves, leaving the tree completely bare.
A tree along the road,
Crowned in blood red,
The few tears it held,
Tears of blood,
The moment seems to stop.
I stand there in this serenity.
I observe as the dove settles at its feet,
Where another it has come to meet,
Together the pair at this lone beat,
And here I am at this front row seat,
Directly under life’s glaring heat.
There comes a gust.
The crown breaks,
The tears fall,
The pair stirs,
There is nothing left,
I close my eyes as I lose a tear.
-Crimson Autumn
